Archive for June, 2008


I’ve tried to be good…

June 29, 2008

I’ll be the first to admit I get into trouble now and again but I have had it.  I’ve been nice and courteous and everything but where has it gotten me? Nowhere.  So fine.  You want the snarky DanAzraella?, you got her! (100’s of Ravenclaws’ heads just exploded at the sight of my creative puncutation)  I have sat through some daft things in my day but the controversy regarding quiddich and the whole do-over thing just takes the cake.  I know we are all between 11 and 18 but honestly, grow up.  The game was fair, life isn’t so pick your damn battles before I toss you in the damn lake.   Think I won’t?,  think again. (Just to deal with any Magpie-Minds I may have missed the first time)  The whole thing is pretty ridiculous. 

Hufflepuff is winning the house cup year to date?  I’m sorry has that ever happened?  I mean in the whole history of time has any Hufflepuff done anything…?  I mean I’m just saying-when the most notable alumni is actually a dead quiditch player who never actually made it to graduation … your pretty much the undergod or under hog or whatever they claim to be. Under-badger.. oh yeah that house is made of win.. and I use my sacastic voice liberally there.

Oh and the Gryffindors.  Have you seen there house points this year?  Apparently they can’t find thier own asses without both hands, a map and the side of a barn … Which when you think about it is pretty amazing considering how far thier collective heads are wedge up in there. 

Why yes I am bitter that my Hogsmede priivillages were revoked and no I didn’t steal the answers to the DADA test but when  I find out who did they will find it easy to find thier own ass it’ll be at the end of my foot.


Round 2 Quidditch

June 18, 2008

1. At the beginning of the year feast, who is the only person who rudely interrupts Dumbledore during his speech?

b. Professor Umbridge


2. Off what street is the alley where Harry first met Sirius?

c. Magnolia Crescent

3. Tonks’ mother had two sisters, both pure-bloods, and both left on the Black Family Tree. What are their names?

c. Narcissa and Bellatrix

4. What spell are the students studying in McGonalgall’s class when Umbrdige is doing her inspection?

b. The Shrinking Spell

5. Who comes to warn Harry and the rest of Dumbledore’s Army that Umbridge and her group of followers are coming to break up their meeting?

Answer: Dobby

6. Who are the members of the Order that met Harry Potter in the Dursely’s house during the summer before his fifth year?

b. Alastor Moody, Albus Dumbledore, Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, Nymphadora Tonks, Dedalus Diggle, Sturgis Podmore, Emmeline Vance

7. Moody used the Disillusionment Charm on Harry.

a. Yes

8. Which of these Death Eaters is Sirius related to?

d. All of these

9. At what age did Sirius leave his home?

Answer: sixteen

 10. How many of the original Order members were killed (don’t include those who disappeared)?

a. 9


Picture Scavenger

Post these pictures to your blog. They must either be posted or linked to from your blog in order to receive points.

Kingsley Shacklebolt

Bellatrix Lestrange

Nymphadora Tonks & Remus Lupin



June 13, 2008

This past weekend I served my time in detention with Hagrid.  It was actually fairly interesting. There was a whole laundry list of tasks I was hopping from breakfast to supper.  From feeding the chickens to checking on the schools owls.  At one point Hagrid noticed that a thestral was missing (How can you tell them apart?nd we went off tracking them.  Apparently it was a yearling that just bolted for the herd and it ended up on the far side of the lake.  It was just wild with panic Hagrid couldn’t get near it.  No idea why it was so scared.  There was this mask for it.  Not a halter just a little hood, if we got it on we could get it over it’s head we could leave it back to the herd and they would calm him down.  Hagrid couldn’t get close.  He’s so loud and so big he can’t sneak worth a damn.  I stayed down wind and stayed at the base of a tree not moving.  It’s a skill not moving. Most people can’t do it.  Just staying immobile barely breathing you can blend into anything.  You can be overlooked in almost any situation So I squatted by the tree base and waited about an hour before the thestral came close enough to me sniffing the grass so I slipped the hood around his head.  He wasn’t very happy, luckily Hagrid was strong enough to make the testral stop bucking and led him quietly.  We had just started back when we ran into the centaurs. They were very rude.  I can’t say they weren’t but they complimented me on my patience.  One named Ronan was almost friendly towards me.  I think I’ll go back and see if I can see them again.  They are interesting, they all had bows in thier hands.  Hagrid showed me the mer-people in the lake.  One speaks a bit of english but the rest of it was merish.  It sounded very weird.  I asked Hagrid if he could speak merish, he couldn’t, apparently Professor Dumbledore could (as time goes on it seems there was less and less that man couldn’t do a few more years and people will say he created the sunshine).  Professor asked if I wanted to learn merish and he’ed see if anyone was around who could teach me.  All and all it was probably the least pointless way to spend a detention and I was warned next time I would be cleaning out the owlery. Ew. So I think I’ll keep my mouth shut…..well at least,  until someone else gets detention and cleans it out…..

This weekend is Hogsmede-I’m looking forward to it.


Detention Homework

June 5, 2008

Excerpt form a report on Spoo…

“… stated that spoo were tiny, pasty, mealworm-like creatures that were regarded with contempt by most of the sentient species that have encountered it. According to Straczynski, spoo “are the only creatures of which the Wizarding Animal Rights Protection League says, simply, ‘Kill ’em.’

“The process of raising spoo was described by Straczynski in detail. The creatures are raised on ranches on ranches with moist and chilly climates, not because the creatures thrive in such environs, but because it produces the best level of paleness in the creatures’ skin. Starting a spoo ranch is relatively easy: the only requirement is to place 200 spoo in the middle of the ranch and wait. Within a short period of time, they have reproduced in sufficient numbers and harvesting can commence, with the preferred method being a simple whack with a stick. Little physical effort is required to cull the herds—spoo are incapable of moving more than six inches (15 cm) in a year, tend to stay propped up against one another “ostensibly for mutual protection,” with attempts at movement usually ending up in the creatures toppling over. The primary difficulty in spoo ranching is in the only sound the creatures make: loud, continuous sighing. The only protection against the sighing is the use of earmuffs, which eventually cannot block the sheer volume of sighs as the harvest progresses—when whacked, a spoo simply sighs more loudly. The sighing often triggers bouts of major depression, with some ranchers even going mad from the incessant sighs.

“As a widely consumed food product, like coffee or beef, spoo is a traded commodity, where the price of the product at the consumer level is dictated by the price on common exchanges. During one day  the price of a spoo sandwich started at ten knuts an ounce; at the end of the same day it has gone up to fifteen knuts. While this could be a simple mistake by the Daily Prophet one  assumes that it is an actual demonstration to spoo’s exorbitant volatility in the market.

“Unlike other products, not only is spoo a tradable commodity, but spoo ranches themselves, like large corporations, sell shares. It is not known if this is facilitated by spoo’s immense popularity or because the ranches’ value is exacerbated by their rarity (due to the difficulty of, and disproportionately high suicide rate in, spoo ranching).

A Spoo rancher is often confused with a nerf herder.  A nerf herder is a lower class outdoorsman who spends his days safeguarding the nerfs on various continents across the world. A worlds away from spoo, nerfs are grumpy, antlered herbivores, resembling yaks, raised for their milk and meat. The average nerf is roughly half a meter long and well over a meter tall. They have long, dull horns protruding from the head.  Nerf hearders can best be compared to the American cowboy or shepherds of old in their steadfast pursuit of an independent lifestyle. They generally wear old, worn out work clothes and carry simple projectile weapons as well as staves they use to drive obstinate nerfs out of their hiding places. Due to their significant skills in fieldcraft and gunplay, as well as not having the resources to bathe and change their clothes often, the rest of the “civilized” people look down upon them. Except the spoo ranchers who rather obviously look up.


In Trouble Again

June 1, 2008

In addition to my usual homework I now have an extra paper due for Care of Magical Creatures and a weekend detention to work off.  And it isn’t my fault!!

After last week we did unicorns (yawn) Hagrid brought out the Thestrals.  Of course it was really funny to see everyone’s face as they tried to figure out was going on.  Only myself and 2 other 2nd Years could see them.  Only people who have witnessed someone’s death can see them (cheery, no?)  Well Hagrid asked who could see them the 3 of us put up our hands and suddently he’s asking who we saw die! Huh?  Sorry I don’t do the let’s sit in the circle and share thing thanks.  What does he expect that we all hold hands and sing Kumby-fracking-yah? Sorry I’m not for sharing wrenching moments of my past in front of a bunch of 13 year olds. Well apparently my attitude needs some adjusting and now I have detention this weekend and a scroll on Spoo due Monday (not the cat, I asked).